My name is Vanessa and I am a certified meditation teacher and mindfulness coach.
My journey to where I am today has been somewhat unusual. I have a master’s in mathematics, and I used to work as a STEM PhD researcher. From the outside I seemed motivated, goal-oriented and successful. However, on the inside I was a complete mess. I avoided dealing with my trauma and most of my life decisions were made on autopilot and other people’s opinions. I was unhappy, had a lot of anxiety, occasional panic attacks, and a general dissatisfaction with life.
This all changed with my first fundamental decision to quit drinking for good. Like more and more people today, I used drinking as an escape from my very real emotions I couldn’t deal with, which let me go on with life without having to actually acknowledge what was happening inside of me. Once there weren’t any distractions, I suddenly had a lot of stuff to deal with. Where is my life heading? Why am I at a job I don’t like? Why do I let others cross every single boundary I set? Why do I feel anxious all the time? Why am I obsessing over so many things that are in the past? Why can’t I change anything about this? All of a sudden, all of these questions urged for answers, and I had none.
Slowly, I turned to discovering and adopting new and healthy coping mechanisms. I started to meditate, journal, read, meditate some more, cry when I needed to, and so on. My life was slowly but surely taking a new turn. And this time, I was the one making the decisions. I had found my purpose in meditation. I enrolled in a program and got a certification for teaching mindfulness and meditation. This once stressed out (still sometimes), frustrated and angry girl found peace and comfort in meditation. She found purpose in guiding others through the path she was taking herself as well. Letting others know too that life can be better. That life is not supposed to be survived but lived.
I experienced something for the first time in my life – I had hope. Hope that I have a say in my happiness. Hope that I am enough. Hope that no matter what my circumstances are, I am allowed to feel joy. Hope that there is love and acceptance within me, for myself and others. Hope that we all carry great compassion and kindness inside of us, whether we know that or not.
My mission is to show you how to find your way back to yourself through meditation and mindfulness. To help you rebuild trust within yourself and regain balance in your life. To help you stop surviving and start thriving in life. Let’s bring you back to your inner home.